MAY 28: Let the Universe Support You

Who or what is your source of power? Who or what are you connected to?

Watch yourself as you go through your days. Where do you get your nurturing, your support, your empowerment, your energy? Does it all come from one person? Do you have a multitude of sources? Do you consider God, the Divine, your ultimate source?

There was a time when many of us made one person our only source. That time is past. Although special people are in our lives to be of special support, one of our lessons has been to broaden our connections, to connect to the universe, to open up to all the love and support that is there for us. If we use for our source only one person, one job, one place, one situation, we may encounter problems. Searching for many sources of support is a sign of our growth, a sign that we are continuing on our journey.

Value and cherish the people in your life who feed your soul and nurture your heart. Value and cherish the people who are special to you, who you hold dear, who help support you. But don’t limit your connections. Open your heart to a living universe. Open your heart to Divine love.

Know that if you can’t get what you need from one person or place, it is because the universe has something or someone better for your needs and your growth.

Who and what are you connected to? Are you willing to become connected to the universe?

Open your heart, your mind, your soul, and let the
universe teach you about Divine love. Stop limiting
your source to only one person. Open to a limitless
source of support and energy. Open to the universe.

May 27: Say when it’s not right for you

Not all doors that open up are good for us to walk through.

Sometimes, we’re in that dark corridor, and no doors or windows are open. Then, a crack of light appears. We get an offer—for a job, for a relationship, for a place to live. Our gut goes off. We know this isn’t right for us. If we weren’t desperate, we wouldn’t consider it.

You’re not desperate. Even if you are, act as if you aren’t. If it’s not right for you, it’s not right for you. Back off—even though you may be burning with impatience and desperation.

You don’t have to do anything that’s not right for you.

God, grant me a spirit of serenity and patience. Help me take a moment before making any decision to ask for guidance first.

Gossip: May 26

Intimacy is that warm gift of feeling connected to others and enjoying our connection to them.

As we grow in recovery, we find that gift in many, sometimes surprising places. We may discover we’ve developed intimate relationships with people at work, with friends, with people in our support groups—sometimes with family members. Many of us are discovering intimacy in a special love relationship.

Intimacy is not sex, although sex can be intimate. Intimacy means mutually honest, warm, caring, safe relationships—relationships where the other person can be who he or she is and we can be who we are—and both people are valued.

Sometimes there are conflicts. Conflict is inevitable. Sometimes there are troublesome feelings to work through. Sometimes the boundaries or parameters of relationships change. But there is a bond—one of love and trust.

There are many blocks to intimacy and intimate relationships. Addictions and abuse block intimacy. Unresolved family of origin issues prevent intimacy. Controlling blocks intimacy. Off balance relationships, where there is too great a discrepancy in power, prevent intimacy. Caretaking can block intimacy. Nagging, withdrawing, and shutting down can hurt intimacy.

So can a simple behavior like gossip—for example, gossiping about another for motives of diminishing him or her in order to build up ourselves or to judge the person. To discuss another person’s issues, shortcomings, or failures with someone else will have a predictable negative impact on the relationship.

We deserve to enjoy intimacy in as many of our relationships as possible. We deserve relationships that have not been sabotaged.

That does not mean we walk around with our heads in the clouds; it means we strive to keep our motives clean when it comes to discussing other people.

If we have a serious issue with someone, the best way to resolve it is to bring the issue to that person.

Direct, clean conversation clears the air and paves the way for intimacy, for good feelings about ourselves and our relationships with others.

Today, God, help me let go of my fear of intimacy. Help me strive to keep my communications with others clean and free from malicious gossip. Help me work toward intimacy in my relationships. Help me deal as directly as possible with my feelings.

May 24

I was on a train in China with my hiking partner. The train’s departure time was delayed. We sat across a table from a man and woman who looked to be in their late twenties or early thirties. The delay in departing went on and on. Like us, the couple we sat across from had brought a large bag of snack foods onto the train.

“They remind me of us,” I said in a voice they could clearly hear. I didn’t think this couple spoke English. “Kind of cute, but nerdy. And look,” I said. “They’ve already eaten all their snacks, and we haven’t even left the station.”

Finally, the train took off. About half an hour into the ride, the man across from us smiled. “So, where are you guys from?” he asked in perfect English.

We can prejudge people to be gods and saints, then become disappointed when we find out they’re not. We can assume that others have nothing to teach us because of their humble or simple lifestyles. Some people say that to assume makes an ass out of u and me. Usually when I assume, it simply irritates other people and makes an ass out of me.

Inventory Focus: Are you prejudging a situation or a person right now? Do you have a history of pre-deciding how something or someone is going to be, then plowing ahead based on that decision instead of staying aware and open? Is life trying to get your attention right now? Sometimes circumstances change. There’s no substitute for daily awareness.

MAY 23: Trust That Guidance Will Come

Trust and act on the guidance you have now.

Some parts of our lives appear like a long, paved highway. We can see exactly where to go; we have a panoramic view. Other times, it may feel like we’re driving in the dark with only one headlight on a winding road through the fog. We can only see a few feet in front of the car.

Don’t worry if you can’t see that far ahead, if you only have a glimmer of light to guide your path. Slow down. Listen to your heart. Guidance will come. Trust what you hear. Do the small thing. Take that one step. Go as far as you can see.

Then go back to your heart, and you’ll hear the next step. It may be a step of immediate action, or deliberate inaction. Sometimes you may have to quiet down, wait, and prepare yourself to hear what you’re to do next.

Trust and act on the guidance
you have now, and more will come.

May 22: Say when the price is too high

The cost of a thing is the amount of what I call life which is required to be exchanged for it, immediately or in the long run.
— Henry David Thoreau

Consider the young man who was doing great in his high school studies, then suddenly started to fall behind. One day, a teacher pulled the young man aside and asked him what happened. The student told him that he had asked his father for a car, and the father told him that if he earned the money, he could have one. The student, being industrious and hard working, went out, got a job, saved the money, and bought the car. But then the car needed insurance, gas, and maintenance, so the student kept the job to keep up the car. The job took up more and more of his time, until finally he began to fall behind in his studies.

“Why don’t you just get rid of the car?” asked the teacher.

“Get rid of the car?” came the reply, “but how would I get to my job?”

How often we feel that if we just get that new car, that new boyfriend or girlfriend, that promotion, or the condo in the good neighborhood, we will find happiness and contentment —only to discover that the thing just brings with it more pain, more costs, and more bother than it’s worth. The new sports car runs only half the time, the new partner needs more care than your dog, the promotion eats up your weekends, and the new condo won’t allow pets.

Things don’t bring true happiness. Instead, they often sap your strength and leave you emptier than you were before. Think about the true cost of a thing before you pursue it—in time, lifestyle changes, energy, maintenance, and money. Can you really afford the amount of life that the thing will take from you in return for the happiness it brings? Are you willing to pay the price?

God, help me be aware of the true cost of the things in my life.

Getting Needs Met: May 21

I want to change careers…. I need a friend…. I’m ready to be in a relationship….

Regularly, we become aware of new needs. We may need to change our behavior with our children. We may need a new couch, love and nurturing, a dollar, or help.

Do not be afraid to recognize a want or need. The birth of a want or need, the temporary frustration from acknowledging a need before it’s met, is the start of the cycle of receiving what we want. We follow this by letting go, then receiving that which we want and need. Identifying our needs is preparation for good things to come.

Acknowledging our needs means we are being prepared and drawn to that which will meet them. We can have faith to stand in that place in between.

Today, I will let go of my belief that my needs never get met. I will acknowledge my wants and needs, then turn them over to my Higher Power. My Higher Power cares, sometimes about the silliest little things, if I do. My wants and needs are not an accident. God created me, and all my desires.

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