Wait and See – Day 4

November 08, 2018

I banged my head on a metal ledge. The pain was fierce. Two days later, I finally went to see a doctor. “You’ve got a concussion,” he said. “One of the problems with a concussion is that you’re stunned. The concussion keeps you from seeing clearly enough to know that you’re hurt and need help.”

That wasn’t the first time denial had been one of the symptoms of a problem I had. When I was using alcohol and other drugs, I left a trail of destruction in my path like a wake behind a boat. But each insane thing I did made perfect sense to me. When I was trying to make an alcoholic behave, I could see that he kept drinking and things weren’t improving. But a symptom of codependency was a fog that kept me from seeing that I was hurt and needed help.

We can become enmeshed in many situations where we’re aware that something is wrong, but we don’t know what it is. Whenever I hear myself saying, “This can’t be happening,” it usually is.

Inventory Focus: Instead of berating yourself for not knowing something you don’t or can’t see, are you willing to be gentle with yourself while you wait for clarity?

From the book: 52 Weeks of Conscious Contact

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